December 10, 1993

I took two dollars out of my money memory box today, because I needed the money to get into the game. I took a dollar out from each time he gave me money.

Well Ms. Jackson knows everything about Mikey, except his full name, so she was subbing for Ms. Childs today and she asked me about him. I explained what all was going on and she kept saying that I have to be careful and that he has a stronger heart than me, so the one that will get hurt will be me. She also told me to be careful and not get pregnant. I let her read all three of my poems and she told me they were good we talked about his wife and she said even if they did get a divorce don’t look forward for him staying in there if he could leave is responsibilities now then if he did get me pregnant then 9 chances out at 10 he would leave that one faster than he got into it. I don’t plan on letting him do anything that would get me pregnant. She gave me so much advice, and it wasn’t mean like “he’s just using you.” It was just be careful, I don’t want you to get hurt kind of stuff. She really helps me a lot. I’m glad I have her as a friend. She gives a lot of good advice that I really need right now. I’m in too deep I don’t know how to get out. I love Mikey with all my heart.

I waited the whole game for him to show up. Anna and I left at the end of the first game and he wasn’t home then we left at halftime of the second and he was, that was at about 8 PM, so I called him and he seemed so angry. I hope he wasn’t mad at me. He also said he was busy and got home late. So, we hung up in less than five minutes, but that’s an average.

I was upset, because I thought he was mad at me or mad and took it out on me. But all I did was turn my radio as loud as it could go. I’m so confused, but I love him just the same.